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Old Jun 29, 2003, 08:14 PM   #1
joelcrowservo
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Default Beatles Books We\'ll Never See

Just a thought or two, if you have any to add...
"Every Photograph Ever Taken Of The Beatles: Volume One-Twenty Thousand"
"Cooking Steaks with Paul McCartney and Yoko Ono"
"Whatever It Is That'll Please You, I'll Do It:Sexual Advise From George Harrison"
"Stories About the Beatles George Martin Hasnt Told 100 Times"
"The Rings of Ringo Starr"
"I Might Not Know Everything About The Beatles"-by Mark Lewisohn
"I Dont Really Know the Beatles and I Dont Like Them All That Much"-Geoffery Guilliano
"I'm Sorry, I Was A Jackass"-Albert Goldman
"The Beatles Anthology as Translated By that Girl From New York with the 'Paul Sprout' Painting"
"Joelcrowservo-Beloved Beatlelinker"
"John Lennons Fresh Bread and Dirty Diaper Polaroids"
[img]images/icons/wink.gif[/img]
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Old Jun 29, 2003, 08:24 PM   #2
ringo_rama
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Default Re: Beatles Books We\'ll Never See

The Secret Love of Paul and Yoko
I'll Admit to Cashing in on John's Legacy by Yoko Ono
No, I'm Not Bitter by Pete Best
Classic Rock Albums: McCartney II
Classic Rock Albums: Ringo the 4th/Bad Boy
Peace and Love and All That Crap by John Lennon and Ringo Starr
Every Woman Any of the Beatles Ever Slept With Volumes 1-80,000
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Old Jun 29, 2003, 09:09 PM   #3
EasternBird
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Default Re: Beatles Books We\'ll Never See

Quote:
Originally Posted By joelcrowservo:
"Whatever It Is That'll Please You, I'll Do It:Sexual Advise From George Harrison"
<font size="2" face="Tahoma, Arial, sans-serif">[img]graemlins/rolling3.gif[/img]

Quote:
"The Beatles Anthology as Translated By that Girl From New York with the 'Paul Sprout' Painting"
<font size="2" face="Tahoma, Arial, sans-serif">[img]graemlins/laugh1.gif[/img] I would pay serious bucks for this!!! There'd better be an audio version as well. [img]graemlins/teeth1.gif[/img]

Here's a few more that came to mind... [img]graemlins/wink1.gif[/img]

"The Incredible, Untold Story of How I Wrote 'Yesterday'" - by Paul McCartney
"The Lost Lennon Papers Vol. XXVI: John's 1978 Federal Income Tax Return" - with foreword by Yoko Ono
"Did You Know I'm Related To George?" - a memoir by Louise Harrison
"A History of Paul's Hair"
"I Wrote This Book All By Myself With Absolutely No Input From Derek Taylor" by Brian Epstein
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Old Jun 29, 2003, 09:14 PM   #4
EnglishRain
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Default Re: Beatles Books We\'ll Never See

"Arthur: The Locks Of George Harrison Finally Speak Out"
"Okay, I Admit It. I Was a Spice Girls' Fan" by George Harrison
"Okay, I Admit It. I Was a U2 Fan" by George Harrison
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Old Jun 29, 2003, 10:30 PM   #5
lennon4
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Default Re: Beatles Books We\'ll Never See

Quote:
Originally Posted By joelcrowservo:
"The Beatles Anthology as Translated By that Girl From New York with the 'Paul Sprout' Painting"
<font size="2" face="Tahoma, Arial, sans-serif">LOL!!! [img]graemlins/laugh2.gif[/img]

Oh, Susan will love that one!

-lennon4
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Old Jun 29, 2003, 11:59 PM   #6
laura
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Default Re: Beatles Books We\'ll Never See

Quote:
Peace and Love and All That Crap by John Lennon and Ringo Starr
Every Woman Any of the Beatles Ever Slept With Volumes 1-80,000
<font size="2" face="Tahoma, Arial, sans-serif">HAHAHA! I love those!

"Crew Cuts - A step-by-step guide" - The Beatles
"All You Need Is Weed" - Paul McCartney
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Old Jun 30, 2003, 05:47 AM   #7
Paolo Meccano
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Default Re: Beatles Books We\'ll Never See

'The Definitive, You'll Never Need to Buy Another, This One Tells You Everything That You'd Ever Need to Know, Beatles Book' by Bill Harry.
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Old Jun 30, 2003, 06:41 AM   #8
LuvLennon
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Default Re: Beatles Books We\'ll Never See

[img]graemlins/laugh1.gif[/img] These are so hilarious!! So nice to have something to laugh out loud about before 10 on a Monday morning!
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Old Jun 30, 2003, 06:58 AM   #9
lennonluvr9
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Default Re: Beatles Books We\'ll Never See

Quote:
Originally Posted By EnglishRain:
"Arthur: The Locks Of George Harrison Finally Speak Out"
<font size="2" face="Tahoma, Arial, sans-serif">LOL! I love that! [img]graemlins/laugh4.gif[/img] Now I gotta try and think of one...
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Old Jun 30, 2003, 09:01 AM   #10
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Default Re: Beatles Books We\'ll Never See

1001 Mary-Sue Romances with the Beatles, edited by Charity C. Case.
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Old Jun 30, 2003, 10:15 AM   #11
lennon4
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Default Re: Beatles Books We\'ll Never See

[img]graemlins/laugh2.gif[/img] Good ol' Charity...

-lennon4
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Old Jun 30, 2003, 01:38 PM   #12
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Default Re: Beatles Books We\'ll Never See

awww, poor joel..."Joelcrowservo-Beloved Beatlelinker" i'd buy that book! [img]images/icons/smile.gif[/img]

my goodness these are all hilarious!

the one i laughed hardest at was: "The Incredible, Untold Story of How I Wrote 'Yesterday'" - by Paul McCartney. but you know, i still wouldn't be surprised if this appeared on a bookshelf next week.
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Old Jun 30, 2003, 03:21 PM   #13
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Default Re: Beatles Books We\'ll Never See

Quote:
Originally Posted By onosideboards:


the one i laughed hardest at was: "The Incredible, Untold Story of How I Wrote 'Yesterday'" - by Paul McCartney. but you know, i still wouldn't be surprised if this appeared on a bookshelf next week.
<font size="2" face="Tahoma, Arial, sans-serif">It already EXISTS, believe it or not, and I own a copy! It's called McCartney: Yesterday and Today by Ray Coleman. It's sort of a mini-bio about Paul that's all centered around that song. Just glancing at the index page, there's at least 50 references to the song throughout the work.
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Old Jun 30, 2003, 04:43 PM   #14
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Default Re: Beatles Books We\'ll Never See

Quote:
Originally Posted By lennon4:
</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Tahoma, Arial, sans-serif">Quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Tahoma, Arial, sans-serif">Originally Posted By joelcrowservo:
"The Beatles Anthology as Translated By that Girl From New York with the 'Paul Sprout' Painting"
<font size="2" face="Tahoma, Arial, sans-serif">LOL!!! [img]graemlins/laugh2.gif[/img]

Oh, Susan will love that one!

-lennon4
</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Tahoma, Arial, sans-serif">Susan does! [img]graemlins/laugh4.gif[/img]
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Old Jun 30, 2003, 04:46 PM   #15
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Default Re: Beatles Books We\'ll Never See

"The Rejected Stories of Rooftop Sessions" edited by Caitlin Jane Frou-Frou (she of the gentian blue eyes...)
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Old Jun 30, 2003, 05:50 PM   #16
MissusLennon
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Default Re: Beatles Books We\'ll Never See

My favourites

"I Dont Really Know the Beatles and I Dont Like Them All That Much"-Geoffery Guilliano

"I'm Sorry, I Was A Jackass"-Albert Goldman

"The Beatles Anthology as Translated By that Girl From New York with the 'Paul Sprout' Painting"

"The Incredible, Untold Story of How I Wrote 'Yesterday'" - by Paul McCartney
---

I was laughing so hard when I read these, I'm sure my mum thinks I've gone insane (well, more insane than I already was [img]images/icons/wink.gif[/img] )

You know, this would make a great Mind Games game!
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Old Jun 30, 2003, 07:21 PM   #17
ringo_rama
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Default Re: Beatles Books We\'ll Never See

Songs Recorded by Ringo Starr in the 90s That Don't Have a Reference to Any Beatles Song (3 paragraphs long)
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Old Jun 30, 2003, 07:37 PM   #18
joelcrowservo
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Default Re: Beatles Books We\'ll Never See

I forgot some:
"We Love Paul!" by former Wings Members
"The Linda McCartney Story" by Heather Mills
"The 96 Track Studio and Other Patented Inventions of Magic Alex"
"Damn I'm Stupid!"- by Dick Rowe
"How To Get Along with Your Step-Mother"-by Julian Lennon
"A Complete Musical Analysis:Two Virgins"
"Harry Potter and the Magical Mystery Tour" (Harry and the MMT wizards? a sure fire hit!)
"Sgt. Pepper Was My Idea"-Various Authors
"Allen Klien:The Man Who Saved The Beatles"
"Great Guitar Solos of Ringo Starr"
"OK, I Broke Up the Beatles and Always Hated Paul, Sue Me"- by Yoko Ono
"New York Times Crossword Puzzles Inspired by Revolution #9"
BTW, I cant remember, who said they'd read 'joelcrowservo:Beloved Beatlelinker"? Believe me, you dont want to. Its a sordid little affair.

[size="1"][ Jun 30, 2003, 09:07 PM: Message Edited By: joelcrowservo ][/size]
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Old Jul 01, 2003, 09:25 AM   #19
lennonluvr9
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Default Re: Beatles Books We\'ll Never See

How bout this one?

The Popularity of the Beatles (and other guitar groups that were on thier way out) by Decca Records
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Old Jul 01, 2003, 02:03 PM   #20
MissusLennon
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Default Re: Beatles Books We\'ll Never See

"My Brother's Cousin's Friend's Sister's Mother's Uncle's Step-sister's Dad's Niece's LP - the revealing story of my link to the unknown album that the Beatles plagarised!"
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