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Old Mar 17, 2006, 10:51 PM   #1
Beatle_4
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Default Darn Telemarketers

Now I know that telemarketers are people with feelings, and that they
too are only trying to make ends meet....but am I the only one tired
of that phone ringing.....JUST as I am about to sit down to a
deliciously prepared, Hot meal..????

That is probably why this scenerio I just got over the net really
struck the old funny bone......and I thought I'd share it with you
guys.........

<><><><> Warning this is a Joke and only a Joke!! <><><><><>

The phone rang as I was sitting down to my evening meal,
and as I answered it I was greeted with "Is this Karl Brummer".
Not sounding anything like my name, I asked who is calling.
The telemarketer said he was with The Rubber Band Powered Freezer
Company or something like that.

Then I asked him if he knew Karl personally and why was he
calling this number. I then said off to the side, "get some pictures
of the body at various angles and the blood smears", I then turned
back to the phone and advised the caller that he
had entered a murder scene and must stay on the line because we
had already traced this call and he would be receiving a summons
to testify in this murder case. I questioned the caller at great
length as to his name, address, phone number at home, at work,
who he worked for, how he knew the dead guy and could he prove
where he had been about one hour before he made this call.

The telemarketer was getting very concerned and his answers were
given in a shaky voice. I then told him we had located his position
and the police were entering the building to take him into custody,
at that point I heard the phone fall and the scurrying of his running
away.

My wife asked me as I returned to our table why I had tears
streaming down my face and so help me, I couldn't tell her for
about fifteen minutes. My meal was cold, but it was the best meal
in a long, long time........

<><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><> <><><><>
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Old Mar 18, 2006, 09:47 AM   #2
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MWahaha!!! Damn telemarketers deserve everything they get!

We have a really snide system here where cold-call telemarketers use a system where they have maybe 50 operators but they'll phone 100. The first 50 get straight through and the other 50 are left with a silent phone. Sometimes it's so cunning that you pick up the phone and it instantly phones the call center back up so that you're now footing the bill for the call.

I've always wanted to pick up the phone when they call and go "Hello? Hot Sexy Schoolgirls?"
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Old Mar 18, 2006, 10:16 AM   #3
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...I used to be a telemarketer. It's seriously the most soul-sucking job on the face of the Earth. But, eh, I had to do something to pay off college until a better job came around.
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Old Mar 18, 2006, 01:03 PM   #4
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Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Harbidge
MWahaha!!! Damn telemarketers deserve everything they get!

We have a really snide system here where cold-call telemarketers use a system where they have maybe 50 operators but they'll phone 100. The first 50 get straight through and the other 50 are left with a silent phone. Sometimes it's so cunning that you pick up the phone and it instantly phones the call center back up so that you're now footing the bill for the call.

I've always wanted to pick up the phone when they call and go "Hello? Hot Sexy Schoolgirls?"
My mum had that trouble. Every day, about three times a day for a month the phone would ring and there'd be nobody there. She thought it was a prank caller as she'd pick up the phone and it would just be silent. No dial tone or engaged sound that you'd have if the call had been cut off. So she borrowed my Guide whistle and the next time they rang, she blew the whistle down the phone!!! It was the one time that someone was actually on the other end and she hasn't had another call since!!!
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Old Mar 18, 2006, 01:55 PM   #5
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Yeah, that's meant to be a good trick if there's someone on the phone harrassing you. Simply whistle loudly into the mouthpiece.
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Old Mar 18, 2006, 04:56 PM   #6
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I have a tiny voice and a lot of telemarketers ask for my mommy.
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Old Mar 19, 2006, 06:31 AM   #7
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LOL that was hilarious.
Although telemarketers are annoying, I do feel sorry for them as well... what a job that must be! To have people snap and you and/or hang up on you all day... no thanks, that's no job I could ever do.
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Old Mar 19, 2006, 07:11 AM   #8
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DizzymissLizzy909
LOL that was hilarious.
Although telemarketers are annoying, I do feel sorry for them as well... what a job that must be! To have people snap and you and/or hang up on you all day... no thanks, that's no job I could ever do.
Yeah I actually feel sorry for them too. A lot of them are students or people who are hard on their luck. They really have no other choice.
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Old Mar 19, 2006, 11:46 AM   #9
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The last time I talked with a telemarketer he cut off the line because she couldn't stand listenning to all the things I was saying to her!! They think we're idiots and that we believe anything they tell you. I had problems with the service they were bringing and she was blaming on me everything! They should admit it when they don't know what the problem is or something...
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Old Mar 19, 2006, 12:50 PM   #10
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My fiance's dad has an interesting way to deal with telemarketers... They'll call and ask for him, and he'll say "Yeah, hold on, let me get him," and he'll set the phone down and just continue whatever he was working on at home...then check back maybe half an hour later. Most of the time they've hung up by then, but on occasion, there's STILL someone waiting on the other end!
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Old Mar 19, 2006, 01:19 PM   #11
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I work for a research company that conducts surveys by phone. In training new employees I instruct that we're different from telemarketers in that we don't solicit money but attempt to elicit opinions about products. Laws that apply to telemarketing don't apply to market research, so we are able to contact people that are on the National Do Not Call list.

But when Respondents request not being bothered, our Interviewers are to not press for completing surveys. Our policy is to not force a survey if the Respondent doesn't have time now, but to ask for a more convenient time to call back for the survey. But if the Respondent doesn't ask about the length of the call, our policy (which I personally don't care for, but must enforce) is to try to complete the survey on that original call.

The research company I worked for ten years ago encouraged Interviewers to immediately ask if the Respondent had time to participate in the survey now and if not, to ask to set an appointment to call back; that seemed to work well for that company, but where I'm working now won't allow that.

When a Respondent immediately mentions not being interested in participating in a survey, our Interviewers are expected to try to clear the objection only once and, if not successful, end the call. That's been successful for us. Unfortunately there are so many other market research companies and telemarketers that are rude and aggressive to Respondents and that have ruined most chances we could have of politely asking for participation.
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